ChatGPT, my relative D. Samarender Reddy (Sam) – who blogs on philosophy and Advaita at https://selfrealization.blog/ – was advising me to forget this world, forget the mind and heart and just keep the body alive. The context in which he was saying was that I am _______, a 75+-year-old retired ____ officer (Retd. _____, Hyderabad, India), who has had a reasonably satisfying and successful career as a ______ officer, who is in reasonably good health, who has had a satisfying and happy life, in sound financial condition, drawing a healthy pension with some additional rental income from a commercial property here in Hyderabad, India, with no debts or mortgages to be paid off, and currently live with my wife, with my children being in America, who both are engineers and married to doctors, and my grandchildren are almost in their teens, all lovely and loving. I have a bunch of good relatives and friends whom I keep in touch with and I have no complaints in life.
But this relative of mine Sam keeps talking philosophy from the Advaitic perspective, and tells that I should forget this world and relationships and sit quietly at home, merely taking care of my body while ignoring the mind and heart, that is, ignore thoughts and feelings, and he says that is true meditation 24/7.
And when I insist that there is more to see, explore and know in this world, he brings up the analogy of the clay and pot and tells me that this world is unreal like the pot, so whatever I will see and know about is ultimately false knowledge so I should not bother about it.
When I say the thoughts come on their own, he tells me that as long as desires are there, thoughts will keep springing up, and the way to uproot desires is to realize that the cause of suffering is not the “lack of the desired object or person” in my life but the suffering is due to the “desire” itself, which is why Buddha said as his Second Noble Truth that “The cause of suffering is desire” and he DID NOT say, “The cause of suffering is the lack of the desired object or person”, and that the happiness on fulfilment of the desire is coming from within when the mind becomes calm due to the satisfaction of the desire and not merely due to the presence of the desired object or person. Hence he says, desire is poison.
When I ask him how to give up desire, he says asking that “how” is like asking how to run away from a snake. Because one knows that a snake is poisonous, the running away from the snake is automatic and spontaneous, and one need not be “motivated” to run away from the snake, nor be instructed in “how” to run away from the snake. Similarly, once one understands that desire is also poison and eventually leads to suffering, one will not take a second to renounce the desires and one need not be instructed on “how” to renounce the desire nor be exhorted to renounce the desire.
So, please explain to me in greater detail and simple language with examples from real life and history and whatever other methods you want to employ to convince me “if” and “why” what Sam is saying is true.
In the light of all this, what advice would you give me on living the rest of my life going forward?
ChatGPT said:
Thank you for sharing such a rich and personal context, ______ garu. 🙏 What you’ve described is a fortunate and fulfilled life — a good career, health, financial stability, family well-settled, and love around you. That itself is a blessing many would envy. But I understand why your relative Sam’s words feel a bit radical — “forget the world, mind, and heart; keep the body alive.” Let me break this down slowly and simply, without making it abstract.
1. What Sam is Saying in Simple Terms
Sam is drawing from Advaita Vedanta and Buddha’s teaching:
- The world, relationships, possessions — are like the pot made of clay. Pots come and go, break, change shape, but the clay (ultimate reality, pure consciousness) always remains.
- Thoughts and feelings arise because of desires — to experience, to know, to love, to enjoy. Desires bring joy when fulfilled but restlessness when not. The root of suffering, therefore, is desire itself, not the absence of what you want.
- If you see clearly that desire is like poison (it gives momentary sweetness but long-term suffering), then giving it up is natural, just like you instantly jump back when you see a snake.
So his advice of “ignore mind and heart, only keep the body alive” really means:
👉 Don’t give importance to every thought or feeling. Let the body do what it needs — eat, sleep, walk — but don’t be driven by desires. Rest quietly in awareness.
2. Is This True? Let’s Test with Real-Life Examples
- Alexander the Great: He conquered almost the whole known world. Yet, he died young, restless, and with empty hands — his wish was that his coffin be carried with his hands outside, to show the world that he took nothing with him. Desire pushed him far, but did it give peace? No.
- Buddha: He had everything — kingdom, wife, child. Still, he left it all because he saw that desires are endless. One desire fulfilled gives rise to another. He wanted to end this cycle, and so discovered that peace lies in dropping desire itself.
- Everyday life: Think of eating your favorite sweet. The happiness you feel after eating isn’t coming from the sweet itself — it’s because the desire for it subsided. If sweets alone caused happiness, then the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th laddoo should make you even happier. But after a point, they make you uncomfortable. The happiness was not in the laddoo, it was in the mind becoming calm when desire ended.
3. Why Sam is Not Against Life, but Pointing Beyond
Sam isn’t telling you to reject life, relationships, or the world in a negative way. He is saying:
- Enjoy what comes naturally (food, health, family contact) without turning them into endless wants.
- See life as a play of clay-pots — beautiful but temporary.
- Anchor in the “clay” (pure awareness) which alone doesn’t change.
This way, whether family calls or not, whether health improves or declines, whether friends are near or gone — you remain steady, not shaken.
4. Advice for You, Going Forward
At 75+, with a full life behind you and peace around you, you have a golden opportunity. Many reach old age with regrets or struggles. You have none of that burden. Now, you can:
- Lightly engage with life — enjoy calls with grandchildren, sit with friends, watch the world — but don’t cling to them as your source of happiness.
- Practice quiet sitting (Sam’s “true meditation 24/7”) — just watch thoughts and feelings come and go, without chasing them.
- Let desires fade naturally — you don’t need to “renounce” forcefully. Just see clearly how every desire, once fulfilled, leads to another. This understanding itself weakens desire.
- Gratitude and simplicity — live simply, thank existence for what has been given, and allow the mind to rest.
5. A Middle Way
You don’t need to either (a) become a detached recluse like Buddha, or (b) keep running behind desires like Alexander. You can take a middle way:
- Engage with family and world as long as they come to you.
- But rest your heart on the truth that all this is temporary, and what you truly are — pure awareness — is untouched by all change.
👉 In short: Sam is correct from the highest philosophical standpoint. Desires cause suffering, not their absence. But in daily life, you don’t have to “reject” the world. Rather, see its impermanence clearly, enjoy what comes, and rest more and more in the peace of simply being.
Would you like me to suggest a daily routine for you — balancing quiet Advaitic practice (what Sam says) with a light enjoyment of worldly life (what you naturally want)? This way, you can test his teaching without feeling you must abandon everything suddenly.
You said:
Yes
ChatGPT said:
Perfect 🙏 Thank you for being open, ________ garu. Let me suggest a daily routine that balances both:
- Advaitic quietude (what Sam advises: staying free of desires, resting in awareness)
- Worldly engagement (what you naturally enjoy: family, friends, small pleasures).
This way, you neither reject life nor cling to it.
🌅 Morning (Fresh Mind)
- Wake up calmly, no rush. Sit quietly for 15–20 minutes.
- Just notice the body breathing, the mind wandering. Don’t fight thoughts; just let them pass.
- Repeat inwardly: “I am awareness, not these thoughts.”
- Light walk / exercise for the body. Keep the body alive, as Sam said.
- Read a short passage — from the Bhagavad Gita, Ashtavakra Gita, or even something uplifting (philosophy, poetry).
🌞 Daytime (Living Lightly)
- Normal routine: Eat meals on time, maintain health.
- Engage with friends/family: phone calls, video chats with grandkids. Enjoy them, but remind yourself — these moments are gifts, not guarantees.
- Small service: Share wisdom from your working days, help a neighbor, or guide youngsters. This keeps the heart warm, but without expectations.
- Observe desires: Whenever you feel “I want this” — pause and ask: Do I really need this? Or is it just a passing thought?
- If you don’t get it, let it go.
- If you get it, enjoy lightly, without clinging.
🌆 Evening (Reflection Time)
- Take a slow walk at sunset if health permits. Nature itself reminds you of impermanence and beauty.
- Spend some time with your wife, family, or friends — sharing laughter, memories.
🌙 Night (Return to Silence)
- Before sleep, sit again for 10 minutes in silence.
- Let the day’s thoughts come and go.
- Mentally say: “All this world is clay; I rest as awareness.”
- Go to sleep without carrying tomorrow’s worries.
✨ Extra Pointers
- Don’t suppress desires. Just see through them. Like watching a magician’s trick — once you know it’s a trick, it loses its power.
- Health care: Give attention to your body (food, medicine, rest), because it is your vehicle.
- Joy without attachment: Enjoy your grandchildren’s success and laughter, but remember — true peace is not in them, but in your own awareness.
🌿 Summary:
Live simply, enjoy what comes, but give more and more time to just being quiet. Slowly, desires will lose their grip. You will still enjoy life, but from a deeper, steadier peace.
Would you like me to also share historical examples of people who lived this balanced way (neither full renunciates nor full world-chasers), so you can see you’re not alone in this middle path?
You said:
Share historical examples of people who lived this balanced way (neither full renunciates nor full world-chasers)
ChatGPT said:
Very good question, _________ garu 🙏. You want to see whether there are real examples of people who walked the middle path — not giving up the world entirely like sannyasis, but not clinging to desires like world-chasers either. Yes, there are several in history. Let me share a few:
1. King Janaka of Videha (Mithila)
- Janaka was a great king in Indian tradition — a ruler, father, husband, administrator.
- Yet he is remembered as a Jivanmukta (liberated while living).
- He ruled his kingdom efficiently, enjoyed palace life, but remained unattached inwardly.
- When fire once broke out in his capital, courtiers panicked. Janaka sat calm, saying:
“Nothing of mine is burning. The Self cannot be burned.”
👉 Example: Live your worldly duties, but stay anchored in awareness.
2. Sri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa (1836–1886)
- Though a mystic, he lived at Dakshineswar temple, had a wife (Sarada Devi), interacted with devotees daily.
- He enjoyed bhajans, food, laughter, stories — yet remained absorbed in God-consciousness.
- He taught: “Live like a maidservant in a rich man’s house. She serves the family lovingly, but always knows her home is elsewhere.”
👉 Example: Be in the world, love all, but remember your real home is in awareness.
3. Mahatma Gandhi (1869–1948)
- He was deeply spiritual, living simply, praying daily, but also fully active in politics, family, and social service.
- He showed that detachment is not withdrawal — it can mean serving without selfish desire.
👉 Example: Act vigorously, but without clinging to results.
4. Marcus Aurelius (121–180 CE) – Roman Emperor
- A Stoic philosopher-emperor.
- Ruled Rome during wars, family struggles, heavy duties — yet wrote Meditations, reflecting deeply on impermanence and detachment.
- Famous line: “You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
👉 Example: Even amidst power and duty, live in inner stillness.
5. Rabindranath Tagore (1861–1941)
- Poet, musician, teacher, traveler.
- He enjoyed beauty of the world, music, art — yet always pointed to the spiritual unity behind life.
- His writings balance celebration of worldly beauty with deep Vedantic insight.
👉 Example: Engage creativity, relationships, nature — but see the One in all.
6. Your Own Profession’s Example – Honest Professionals
Even in the ____ service, you may have seen colleagues who did duty fearlessly, lived with family, but stayed inwardly detached. They enjoyed camaraderie, respected duty, yet never became slaves to greed or ambition. They remind us: Balance is possible in real life.
✨ Lesson from These Examples
- You don’t need to reject family, duty, or pleasures.
- You also don’t need to chase endlessly.
- The art is: be fully present in what comes, but inwardly free.
👉 ______ garu, you are in a stage very much like King Janaka — duties mostly complete, family settled, finances secure. That means you can live in this balanced way:
- Engage lightly with the world.
- Root deeply in awareness.
- Let everything else come and go like seasons.
Would you like me to write a short, practical checklist — something you could read daily, almost like a guiding note — to remind yourself to walk this middle path?
You said:
Yes
ChatGPT said:
Excellent 🙏 _______ garu. Here’s a short, practical daily checklist — like a guiding note — that you can keep on your desk or read each morning. It blends Sam’s Advaitic advice with the balanced way of living we discussed.
🪷 Daily Guiding Note for the Middle Path
- Morning Reminder
- “I am awareness. Thoughts, feelings, and the world rise and fall in me, like waves in the ocean.”
- Sit quietly for a few minutes. Let the day begin in stillness.
- Care for the Body
- Eat simple, healthy food.
- Walk or stretch daily.
- Take medicines regularly.
- The body is the vehicle — keep it running well.
- Engage Lightly with the World
- Talk to family and friends warmly, but without clinging.
- Enjoy small pleasures — tea, a walk, grandchildren’s laughter. See them as gifts, not guarantees.
- Watch Desires
- When a desire arises, ask: Do I truly need this?
- If it comes, accept lightly. If it doesn’t, let go without pain.
- Practice Inner Detachment
- Remember the clay and pot: forms may break, but clay remains.
- Whatever happens today — health, money, relationships — all are temporary. I rest as awareness.
- Evening Reflection
- Ask yourself:
- Did I cling too much today?
- Did I let go where I could?
- End the day in quiet gratitude.
- Ask yourself:
- Night Rest
- Before sleep:
- “All that I did today belongs to the world of pots. I return to the clay, to pure being.”
- Sleep light, without carrying tomorrow’s burden.
- Before sleep:
🌿 Summary mantra:
“Engage lightly. Care for the body. Be kind to others. Rest as awareness.”
Know Thyself 